for luke and sarah

This week/end, Luke and his new fiance, Sarah, came for a Thanksgiving visit and I took some engagement photos for them (!!!!!). Congratulations! I love you guys!

*note to Luke and Sarah: I'll edit more from Saturday and put them up as I finish them!

anthro wish list

i'm gunna buy all these things. oh you know...if i weren't in grad school. and if i had a high-paying job.

dreams

Well I had a nightmare last week that I died in an explosive car accident. It was shocking and felt very real. I woke up gasping for air, shaken to my core. In the nightmare, I was driving somewhat carelessly and I swerved to avoid hitting a car, and then a truck carrying huge gas tanks swerved as not to hit me. One of the gas tanks came loose and was flying towards me. I thought to myself, "This can't be it. I can't believe I'm going to die like this."

Last night, I had a dream involving a friend of mine giving me a foot massage. Ew. I hate feet--touching them, them touching me, and people touching mine. I remember my feet were somewhat dirty from walking outside barefoot. I just feel weird about that dream because in it, I didn't mind at all that my feet were getting a massage.

What does it all mean? I don't know. But here's a great song:

book review

The Drama of Scripture
To be honest, when I saw I would be reading a book about the Bible as a whole, I did not think I would be reading much I have not already heard before. Not even 3 pages into the prologue of The Drama of Scripture, I was vigorously underlining sentences and passages. The major points of this book by Bartholomew and Goheen are 1) The Bible is and should be understood as one, unfolding, dramatic and true story, and 2) Everyone has a part in this story. In this paper, I am going to briefly explore my reactions to the book The Drama of Scripture: Finding Our Place in the Biblical Story by Craig Bartholomew and Michael Goheen.
One major element of this book that stood out to me is God’s all-encompassing redemption plan. Through the sacrifice and resurrection of Jesus Christ, all things will be made new. So often people view salvation as being able to go to heaven when they die. It delights my heart to know that God intends to redeem everything he created. This idea can be seen in the story of Noah. God did not instruct Noah to bring several of every animal onto the ark just for the fun of it. God gave these instructions because he is “concerned for the whole of creation—including the animals. Salvation does not stop with humankind: it embraces the whole creation” (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 50, 2004). The passage that stood out the most to me also illustrates the idea of redemption for all of creation:
In the cross, Jesus acts to accomplish his purposes for all of history—to save creation. Too often we reduce the significance of the cross to the fact that ‘Jesus died for me.’…Yet God’s purposes move beyond the salvation of individuals…Jesus dies for the world. (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 164, 2004).
Understanding this concept truly changes my perception of why Jesus died. Yes, Jesus loves me and died for me, but me being able to go to heaven was not nearly the whole purpose of his death and resurrection.
Something that really hit me was how radical a Savior Jesus Christ was. He was nothing like what God’s people were patiently waiting for. The Jews were expecting the kingdom of God in the form of a mighty sweeping away of their oppressors and enemies. As they waited in “fervent expectation, a young man from Nazareth, the son of a carpenter, would announce that the kingdom of God had come to Israel and was even now present in him” (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 127, 2004). Reading this made me literally jump out of my seat, thrust my fist in the air and shout, “YES!” I got chills thinking about what it would have been like to be alive when the kingdom of God was first present on the Earth.
Jesus was no militant king. He was a carpenter and instructed people to love their enemies and to be full of forgiveness instead of revenge. Jesus challenged the practices of the Pharisees, “He deliberately eats and drinks with all those the Pharisees would exclude” (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 139, 2004). However, he did not simply reject the Pharisees eating practices, he rejected what had been represented by them: “separation, hatred, and a thirst for vengeance” (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 139, 2004).
As much as I loved this book, I have a couple issues to take up with the author. One small one is their interpretation of “Let us…” in Genesis 1:26. The authors say that it is God addressing the heavenly council of angels, but I have heard that it is God addressing the Son and the Spirit (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 35, 2004). I have heard that it was a reference to the Trinity. Another issue I have is with the reasoning given for the genocide that God commanded in Deuteronomy 20:16-18, “Above all else, Israel is to be characterized by the worship of the Lord alone…And if the Israelites live among Canaanites, they are in danger of being lured into the worship of other ‘gods’” (Bartholomew & Goheen, p. 84, 2004). If this is the case, should we not then kill our unbelieving neighbors so we are not tempted to sin? Perhaps a better explanation is that God is God and we are sinners. God does not have to justify his actions because he is blameless and holy. Although it is hard to swallow the idea of God commanding the Israelites to commit genocide, we must trust Him and his love for us.
Understanding the Bible as one, continuous, unfolding story has overwhelmingly opened my eyes to the gravity of God’s love. It also enriched the meaning of the things Jesus said and why he did what he did. I am filled with such joy after reading this book.

The Drama of Scripture

Oh. My. Life. The Drama of Scripture by I can't remember who, is a book I have to have read by tomorrow night for a class at Trinity. I have read 3/4 of this book the past 3 days and it is simply wonderful. Understanding the Bible as one, continuous, unfolding story has overwhelmingly opened my eyes to the meaning of things Jesus said and why he did what he did. I will perhaps post my "book report" tomorrow or whenever I finish it.

Stay tuned!

woah!!

Well, folks, yesterday I had a dream that totally threw me for a loop.

It was the most emotionally charged dream I've had for as long as I can remember. It was full of bitterness and heartbreak. Let me tell you, I was more heartbroken in that dream than I have ever been in my life--awake OR asleep. Besides being incredibly emotional, it was a dream within a dream! And I was so convinced that when I woke up (in my dream) that I was ACTUALLY AWAKE. So intense. I blamed it on the piece of chipotle infused chocolate I had before going to bed. However, I ate another piece last night, hoping for another night of crazy of dreams, but alas, it did not work.

It's Friday and it's windy and chilly and I'm LOVING IT! My plans are to get a head-start on this week's reading. And maybe curl up with some tea and a couple gluten-free cookies and watch The Great Debaters as the wind swirls around my house. Cozy, yes?

a prayer

I just started grad school at Trinity last Thursday night. Since then, I have been working nonstop on my hw/projects/papers. And I haven't even started working yet. I start nannying on Monday (2 days a week) and I'll be getting a call here and there to be a sub either in Dist. 21 or the other private schools I'm working for.

So my mom asked the lingering question I've been avoiding asking myself:

"How are you going to do grad school and work at the same time?"

My response: "God help me."

And then I was thinking...YES! GOD HELP ME!

So here is my fast but earnest prayer and I hope you pray it if you happen to read this...

Dear Jesus,

I feel overwhelmed and exhausted and it's only been a week. You are my Creator and my Provider and the Savior of the world! Nothing is impossible for you. Please give me diligence to use my time wisely and strength to complete what needs to be done. Give me restful sleep and energy during the day. And above all, be glorified.

In Your name, Jesus,

Amen.

new new new

New starts:

-Grad school. Grad school!!!??! I started last night. It's a lot of work, but I'm up for it. I'm excited about getting to know everyone in my cohort. 13 people, going through all of this together!

-Nannying job. My middle school jazz band director's 4-year-old twins!!! They are adorable and different and smart. I'm going to be teaching them piano and some spanish. I'M PUMPED!

-I'm on the sub list for the school district as well as 2 other Christian schools.

Well now I'm going to go do homework.

cottage cheese?

A few things on my mind:

I used to hate HATE cottage cheese. The texture just grossed me out. Now I love it with some juicy peaches. Yummmmmmmouthwateringmmmmmm. That's it though...I don't think I would like it any other way.

You know what some INTENSE movies are?

-Doubt

-Brothers

-Inception

Notice, they are all one-word titles. HMMMM.

But here are some one-word titled movies that are not as intense:

-Hook

-Clueless

-Antz

Here's a sign that I've been playing with my silly putty too much:

-I got out of the shower and saw a piece of silly putty in my belly button.

dreams and things

Well, grampa is home again. Grandma is taking care of him as well as she can. He's doing a lot better than she is, though. She's kind of up and down. She's just not herself. I keep praying for her restoration.

So after seeing Inception (twice), I started a dream journal. For the past few years of my life, I feel like I haven't been remembering any of my dreams. So I decided to be intentional about it. The last two mornings I have successfully recorded whatever I remembered dreaming. Here is what I have so far:

7/29/10

-walk into a house,party, a guy from -edited for privacy haha- is there, alone, sketchy looking

kent,Kenny, playing game involving lowering your pants and sitting on the ground.

I realize my pants are falling off so I join in their game. Kent is so happy to see me—(he cries?)

I would just like to comment on this dream---it was not weird at all that we were playing the no pants game. it was really normal.

7/30/10

-teaching at a school

-had to take a wooden raft/boat to get to the gym

-one of my students said, “I could tell we were both different. I knew we would get along.”

*there was way way more to this dream, but these are specifics that I could recall.

Yesterday I saw a hitchhiker. Wearing a hippie-looking jacket. With long hair. In Wheaton, IL.

It was awesome.

pray

My grampa was able to go home on Sunday, but my grandma has barely been able to take care of him because of how severely depressed she is.

So I just woke up a few minutes ago and my mom called and said to pray because grampa was being taken to the hospital. All I know is that someone had to call 911 from my grandparents' house in Elgin, and my mom called me on her way to whatever hospital is around there.

Anyways, my point is, please join me in prayer!

God is good.

YES!

I just want to give a quick update about my grampa: He's doing so much better!

When I last posted, he was feeling very nauseous and throwing up--which, we found out, was because his stomach was "off." When they took out his spleen, they had to take out his stomach as well (and put it back in, of course), which put his stomach in shock and it turned off.

So then they put a tube up his nose, and down his throat, into his stomach to suck up all the stuff sitting in there making him nauseous. That tube would have to stay there until his stomach decided to turn back on.

We were praying for a miracle: a bowel movement. Yes, that's right. Well, after walking 2 laps around the 6th floor, he decided to take a trip to the bathroom. After about 5 minutes, we heard, "Good news in here!" coming from the bathroom.

HE POOPED! My grandma actually jumped up and started doing a jig. We were yelling and dancing. THANK GOD HE POOPED!

So yesterday he got the tube taken out and is feeling so much better now that his stomach works.

Thank you for your prayers! God is good, no matter what.

pray

Whoever reads this post, please pray for my grampa. It's day 4 after his splenectomy and he's not doing well. He's out of the ICU, but is feeling very sick and weak--he threw up, but the reason is not clear. My grandma is struggling with depression and anxiety attacks and has been staying at our house. Please pray for healing and strength.

clothes

Today, I was in a very unusual online shopping mood.

And I thought I'd share some of the things I have on a wish list...








(the pants---they're pink. i don't normally go for pink pants, but i really like the look of these.)

So, what do you think?

a list!

Thank you, John Conterez, for inspiring me to make a list.

Here are some things I want to do, not necessarily in order of importance:

1. Go to a drive in movie
2. take my camera and tripod to some pleasant location and take pictures of the sunrise
3. ride bikes somewhere at nighttime and look at the stars
4. go on a road trip
5. teach in Chicago
6. take free dance classes in Chicago
7. make sushi
8. talk to/perhaps get a date with the cute librarian...found out he has a girlfriend. wah wah wah.
9. start doing yoga again(I started today!)
10. direct a children's choir
11. have a bonfire on the beach
12. have a bonfire in my backyard
13. get baptized(happened August 15!)
14. go salsa dancing and swing dancing
15. visit Clarissa in hicksville and ride 4-wheelers, learn to drive a stick, and blow things up
16. Be in a musical

17. go to the beach
18. Get certified to be a yoga instructor
19. Take a hula-hoop dancing class
20. Go to Europe
21. Re-learn Spanish


I will be adding to this/hopefully checking things off.

life is always happening

Since my last post, my grandparents went to Mayo clinic and immediately the doctors found what was wrong. It's his spleen. So he is getting doses every other day of this medication that is meant to un-confuse his spleen I believe. If this medication doesn't work, he'll have to have surgery on his spleen. With his thin blood, this would be really risky. I'm just continuing to pray for his healing. And for my grandma's peace.

I was so happy they were able to come to my graduation. It was so much fun.

So yes, I am a college grad. This summer I will be babysitting and taking two classes at Harper. Then in the fall I'm anticipating starting the MA in Teaching program at Trinity as well as substitute teaching. OH also, I ran into my middle school jazz band director and turns out she needs a nanny starting in the fall for her twins! I'm soooo pumped. Giddy, in fact. God is my provider!

So besides going to classes, doing homework, and babysitting, here are somethings I'm looking forward to:
-Noah and Jamie's wedding
-Visiting and getting visited by Calli
-Reading
-Going down to the city to see friends, to hear/see music
-Taking lots of pictures
-Seeing Luke a few times
-Dreaming of a road trip, hopefully getting up the nerve to actually do it
-Seeing Bethany and Sarah
-Making new friends

intentions/happy friday

I created this blog intending to document my journey through student teaching. Oh well. It was a great experience and I miss my students.

One of my favorite things is the scent of frozen pizza cooking in the oven. It reminds me of all the Fridays of my childhood when we'd have frozen pizza and pop and sometimes watch a movie. Today, my mom is making it for my dad for lunch.

My Grandma is taking my Grampa to Mayo Clinic on Sunday because his oncologist doesn't know why his blood platelets aren't staying stable for more than 4 hours at a time. He's going to the hospital once a day to get his "dose" of platelets. My Grandma is clearly scared. My Grampa hates not being able to swim or ride his bike or do work around the house. The doctor told him not to do anything but sit. Sit, read, watch tv, sleep. It depresses him. So I'm continually praying for the both of them. And for my mom. I want to be there for her but for some reason I can't figure out HOW.

Do you know how sweet and tender my Grampa is? While he is fighting for his own life, he gets extremely sad when he hears that I'm not feeling well. THAT is my Grampa.

if animals could talk...

Yesterday, students responded to a writing prompt asking, "What if animals could talk? What kinds of questions would you ask them?"

Here is one of my students' letter-for-letter written responses (his spelling is so creative!):
"Theas are my chaweschens if a hipeo could talk. I woud ask wy are you so mean. Or wy they eat us. And wy are they so feroshes. And fite, 'or play,' with each another so much."

Here's part of another response:
"If he was smarter than me he would tell me who was the first person to land on the moon." --he was referring to a dog.


My future is so uncertain. Thank God HE knows what's up.

guess i should update...

I'm updating due to a feeling of obligation, but i don't know who i'm obligated to update...haha.

well here's an update:
-i love my class and getting to know each of the students.
-i love 3rd grade.
-i love valentines day parties at elementary schools.

-i am exhausted.
-i am realizing how time consuming student teaching is.
-i got sick last week and am still fighting it off.
-God has provided ways for me to work through being sick.

-i miss my friends from Moody A LOT.
-A LOT.

-i really want to get a job teaching at C.H.A. or Timothy Christian or Wheaton Grammar and live with Miriam and Kim. Those are my heart's desires right now. I'm praying that I can surrender to wherever God wants me to go/do/live....i just really really hope that it doesn't involve living with my parents.

i got a feelin' *woohoooo*

tonight WAS a good night. thank you black eyed peas.

it was my last night living at moody and we brought it to a close with a BANG!

i got to spend the evening with good friends and to top it off, the get-together evolved into the best dance party that has ever graced jenkins hall.

God has blessed me beyond measure. He fills my life with delight.

i am leaving moody satisfied.

James 3:1

"Let not many of you become teachers, my brethren, knowing that as such we will incur a stricter judgment."-James 3:1

this scares me! i suppose a degree of fear is appropriate.

at the same time, i'm so honored that God would have me be a teacher. and i know that he will provide the strength and wisdom to do it.

he's always been faithful to me.

julie & julia

something i dislike about movies like julie & julia is this: they inspire me to do something that's already been done and done well. cooking through a cookbook and blogging about it is already taken.

other examples:
harriet the spy (after i saw this movie, i got a tiny notebook and started writing down everything as it happened to me. this "spy" phase lasted 20 minutes.)

what other movies can i add to this list?